"This Property Protected by Fire Ants"

And that just about says it all for the entire state of Texas.  I found that warning sign on someone's Pinterest board which had all things Texas pinned on it.  Being that our handyman has been cleaning up the flowerbeds around the house, and trimming all the palm trees, he's been finding many fire ant mounds, all of which get sprayed to within an inch of their creepy crawling lives. Both 'Raid' and 'Hot Shot' have no mercy when it comes to fire ants. And wasps. And spiders.

Speaking of creepy crawling things.... one of tea ladies yesterday must have picked up a scorpion somewhere between her house and mine, because she wasn't in my kitchen for ten seconds yesterday when she swatted something in her hair and screamed out "Something's on me!!"  (Such faith S had in me, not to scream and run the other way....)

She put her head down and asked me to have a look-see... was anything on her?  In her hair?  On her back?  She said she felt a sting on her hand, and when we both looked, one of her fingers was already turning bright red.  "Scorpion sting! I knew it!!" she told me.  Once again, we fluffed up her hair, looking for anything crawling around..... nothing.  Then I turned on the bright ceiling light in the kitchen and looked all over the floor..... and there it was, a scorpion.... she must have swatted it out of her hair and it hit the wall and fell to the floor.  (Such faith S had in me,  not to scream and run the other way....)   I took out the Swiffer mop-thing and smashed the scorpion.  We both looked at one another and cringed and then put on happy faces when the other ladies started coming in the back door.

After the tea party was over yesterday afternoon, I went outside to water the flowers around the fountain and make sure the birds had enough fresh water.... as I went to grab the hose, a huge cricket jumped up on my blouse.  Not an itty-bitty little cricket, but an enormous brown one, large enough to have a top hat and cane and button-down shoes and singing in a Disney movie........... so of course I screamed.  But my husband was upstairs and I knew he didn't hear me, and all the tea ladies were gone.......... so I had to swat that cricket away and off of my blouse, which I did..... then I stood there and cursed all the wildlife and insect life in this entire county, especially those on our own property.